Who are you? Part 2, the essay

I am a fighter. I endure. There's nothing I cannot sustain for a period of time. Pain, injustice, suffering. I refuse to give up, I will never join the circus and I don't know how to stop my own pain, even when I should.

I believe in love and that only love is worth it, everything. Whatever type of love, only love can save us. I also thing that you love a person and that is independent of beauty, gender, sex orientation, skin colour, whatever...

I am also a big advocate of justice, scales and revenge. Perceived injustice bothers me a lot, I can wait years to take revenge or to just witness the scale balancing out on someone.

I am a very kind person and I make a big effort to continuous be gentle towards others. Sometimes it can be too much, not deserved, but I still think that actions of other should not influence how I behave.

I force myself into acknowledge my own pitfalls, fears and wrongdoings. I own some people apologies, and it took me years to confess that to myself. I fear a lot, much more that I like to let on, but I have the audacity to face it, pass beyond it and still try to do what I want to do. Audacity gives me freedom and I love it. 

I hate tradition, conventional, church, hypocrisy, prejudice, patriarchy. I am almost sure I would burn as a witch by the inquisition if I had lived 500 years ago. I refuse to cooperate with any of it, play it cool, keep my mouth shut. For some time in my life I tried to do it, and I crashed and burned. Now I just accept me as I am; I do not force my view on anyone, I don't think I am superior or right, I live my life in peace, but if you send bullshit narrow thoughts on my direction, I will scream top of my lungs. 

I am an optimist. In the end, everything will be solved, everything will be fine. If it's not fine it's because it isn't over.

I choose to believe in what makes my heart light, even if rationally I have doubts. Example: there's nothing after dead. But it's easy if I believe my father is somewhere, that I will see him again and that he hears me when I need him. Everything is possible inside your head, but the true continues to be the truth. By now I live very well with my own paradoxes.